Yesterday's anniversary has started me wondering about British/Indian conflict and how the British came to be involved in India in the first place. Rather than consult the history books like any reasonable person I've used my imagination instead to work out what happened. Maybe it all went a little something like this... picture it... the Royal Court at Windsor... 1600... everyone in wigs...
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Queen Elizabeth I: Hello. And what do you do?
Chairman of the East India Company: Hello. I am the Chairman of the East India Company.
Queen Elizabeth I: That's a bit presumptuous isn't it. You haven't even discovered India yet have you?
Chairman of the East India Company: No, err, but we're pretty sure that...
Queen Elizabeth I: Yes, yes. And you say you want to establish a presence in India?
Chairman of the East India Company: Yes Maam*.
Queen Elizabeth I: Why?
Chairman of the East India Company: We have intelligence suggesting they have weapons of mass destruction.
Queen Elizabeth I: Jolly good. Off you go. We've no option really. The rest will be history...
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* Maam as in farm not Mam as in ham. Yes, I've seen 'The Queen' with Helen Mirren.
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